I'm not going to meet the challenge

2024-11-07

I've resigned myself to the fact that I am not going to finish 100 Days to Offload this year. I don't know why every year I give it a try and then never finish it. Of course, the "goal" is to just start posting more and I think this challenge did help me with that. I managed to post around 50 posts this year, which I think is actually pretty good. That's like a little less than one post per week. So to say that I managed to do that, I'm quite pleased.

I was posting pretty well until the summer months. I had a routine going. But then June came around. I talked about before how I become pretty useless during the summer. One thing that I didn't talk about in that post is how once my routine changes, it's incredibly hard for me to bounce back from it.

Honestly, I'd say I'm still suffering the consequences from it, even a week into November. No matter how much I may "want" to get back to my regular schedule, I'm complacent. Sleeping in later than usual is one of the things I've been slacking on. Lately I've been waking up just on time to run to my laptop and start my work day. It's not been good. I miss having some time before work, because if I don't have the free time before work, I'm now stressing out and doing things after work all the way up to and past midnight. "After work" enables my procrastination brain and even when procrastinating, I never feel good about it. It's like a nagging feel in the back of my mind. "I should be doing this thing but it's okay, I'll wait until 18:25 to get started on it. Okay it's now 18:27 let's extend that to 18:30." And so on, and so on.

Literally, there is no other way for me to get back on the horse other than to just do it. But it's so hard to get past the sleep barrier. So odd of me to say but I want to wake up at 4AM every day like I used to.

Tonight will be my night, and I will good to bed at a reasonable time and wake up early (hopefully).